Posts on août 2009

Where is happiness when it hurts?

“Writing from a moment of deep sorrow.

Tonight, I am alone in Spain. I feel lost. A dear friend touched a very ancient wound. I thought it was a cleared matter, a souvenir. But set the décor, rerun the script and bad memories come haunting you. You are only a nutshell on a furious ocean.

Where is happiness in those moments?

How can someone who is writing about happiness and living it everyday can make such a deep dip? I feel like a frog with my swollen eyes. Coldplay is signing melancholic songs for me, only for me. Far from everybody, I am a lonely soul. So where is happiness when my heart feels it has been left on the side of the road?

“If you ever feel neglected

If you think that all is lost

I’ll be counting up my demons”

It’s not the first time that the same demons come knocking so what is the way to go?

First, there was rage. It took over me. I was screaming, walking all over. I could have broken everything in the flat. Rage, what a curious emotion. Rage like a feeling of omnipotence. Rage, taking back the control over matter when you are totally losing it.

Second, there was self-pity. Why, why, why me?

Third, there was the need to run away. Fourth, fifth… just because the situation, the people touched a painful spot. I thought all this was far behind. What a surprise!

That’s where happiness lies: the truth. Oh yes, I wish I could be way ahead on the road but I still have some undone business to take care of. I have no clue on how to get this past me but I know that if I don’t change my methods of coping, it will rise again. It’s with a swollen heart that I wish I will get to a place of peace to talk to my friend. I know that in these moments you can be quickly overtaken by that suffering voice.

Happiness can’t ignore suffering just like with those kids in the japanese school.

I can’t hide or avoid. There are places, moments in this life that make me question the foundations of my happiness. It seems so clear and easy and suddenly concepts are shadowed by fierce emotions. But even then I can still see the shiny person within who is now coming back to the surface.

A happy life is not a life free of pain

The next day coincidences started to knock at my door again as if life was winking at me and a new door opened. I learned a lot from that moment of despair and how your mind can focus on details to match with your internal scenario. In a world where communication is a central matter, I realize that mine shuts down in crucial moments, only to push myself in recurring stories.

I wanted to share that moment because happiness seems so obvious to me but that little shot reminded me that it will always be an ongoing process.

Documentaries on happiness

A friend of mine sent me a link to this video:

After investigation (ok! clicking on the link), I found out that this video is part of a project on happiness: Happiness seekers. It’s a documentary on happiness. You can watch a serie of interviews HERE.

I wanted to check if the project was not a religious or political propaganda so I investigated further more (ok! I googled) and found out that there were several documentaries on the subject in the doing. For example, The H-factor explores happiness through the eyes of Kayla, a nine year old girl.
An other project with no date or video has an interesting list of interviewees.

I am looking forward to the release of all those documentaries☺

Happiness and Ayurveda

Ayurveda is often described as a holistic science of health and happiness. So I went for a week in an ayurvedic center in Normandy to take a massage class. I stricktly followed the vegetarian, ayurvedic diet.

The 5000-year old Indian system of medicine tells us what to eat, when to eat, how to reside and how to behave. It summons us to a kind of life style that is supposed to lead us to a better living and a long life.

The Ayurveda describes the nature of a happy and unhappy life ( Sukhayu and Dukhayu):
–    Sukhayu (Happy) is the life with mental and physical satisfaction, good power of thinking, physical strength, healthy body, satisfaction in life, energy.
–    Dukhayu (Unhappy) is the life full of mental tensions, diseased body, unsatisfaction in life.

According to Ayurveda, happiness implies feeding our body and mind with good food and education, entertaining healthy relationships with friends and family but also feeding our soul with righteousness. The Vedas (Sacred Texts of Hinduism) say that one can achieve happiness and health only by spiritual practice.


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